Oh No He Didn't

Recently my friend Tanya sent me a link to an article titled 10 Things Women Find Unattractive About Men But Won't Tell Them that was featured on the website SBM (Single Black Male).

The author had some interesting points. It made me think of when a guy tried to tell me what not to eat at a restaurant because he didn't want me to "lose that cute shape" or when I guy hushed me in a movie theater. Look, I am animated and sometimes I get a little excited when I'm really into a good movie. Don't tell me to ssshhh.

Now I'm about a decade older than the author of the SBM piece, so here are a few things I found unattractive about men, but didn't tell them:
 1) Bragging about how much he had — I went out with a guy who found it necessary to tell me that he was driving the most expensive BMW. There were only a few made in the world and he had one of them.There was another guy who drove me around and told me how many buildings he owned and how much his house cost in the suburbs.

2) Pretending to be someone he was not — What's worse than bragging about what you have? Pretending that you have something you don't. I dated a guy who spent his weekends getting dressed up in expensive gear, riding to the club in his friend's Bentley, popping bottles ($400 champaign) in the VIP lounge and making people think he was Mr. Big. Oh, did I mention that he was near 50, had his house foreclosed and his car repossessed.

3) Undependable - I really find it unattractive when a man doesn't do what he says he 's gonna do. If you tell me that you're going to do something, don't call me an hour before with some lame ass excuse that's usually a lie. Keep your word.

4) Lying - Oh man have I heard the lies. It's funny that some men actually think you don't know they're lying. It's very unattractive that you think I'm that stupid. Just because I don't call you on your lie doesn't mean I don't know you're lying. I went out with a guy once who initially told me he didn't have any children. Later he admitted he had four. I asked him why he lied. He said because he didn't think I would go out with him if I knew he had 4 kids. Well, that was for me to decide, and he didn't give me that choice. I've gone out with plenty of fathers. 

5) Not open-minded — I find it unattractive when a man doesn't want to try or do different things. I dated a guy who only wanted to go to the movies and dinner. I like museums, theater, festivals, sporting events, etc. I once suggested we go see Alvin Ailey or Stomp. He said he would go, but he wasn't gonna pay. On another occasion, I suggested we head down to the Alexandria Waterfront. It was a beautiful afternoon, spring I think. He scoffed at the idea and said, "what we gonna do, walk around?" Uh, yeah. It was a gorgeous day.

6) Loud - Why does everyone have to know when you arrive? There’s something about a man who has presence without saying a word. It's a quiet confidence. It shows in the way he walks, his conversation, the way he conducts himself around his peers and the way he treats women.

7)  Expect women to chase them – Remember the guy I met last year who said, “I don’t chase. I got 10 women lined up. Women take care of me.” Yuck. I think there's a difference in showing someone you're interested in them and chasing them. 

8)   Drunk – I think it's very unattractive to see a guy drunk in public or even in private.  A guy came over to my house once, drunk. He reeked of alcohol, that wasn't a good look at all (or smell).

9)  Tardiness – A couple of years ago a guy showed up more than an hour late for our date. Needless to say we never went out again. Obviously he didn't respect my time.




10) Constantly checking his cell during a date – You that important?


Alright, so those are some things that I thought of off hand.
What are some things you find unattractive about men, but won't tell them?

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