My dad is retired so he loves to call me and chit chat. We talk about everything from politics to sports to history to dating. Last week we were having one of our friendly conversations about relationships and my dad stated that women had all the power in a relationship. They make all the choices, he said. Oh, here we go, I thought. (He loves to get me riled up)
I disagreed. Why do you think I'm not married? I asked.
"That's your choice," he said.
Are you serious? My choice is to be married but no one has chosen me, I argued.
My dad wasn't hearing it. He said a man presents himself before a woman, and a woman decides whether or not she wants to deal with that man. She may decide she's not interested in him romantically. She may decide she only wants to be friends. She may decide that she doesn't want to be bothered at all. But ultimately, my dad said, the woman makes the choice.
hmmm.
It reminded me of a conversation I had with my male co-worker after I had seen For Colored Girls. After telling him about the movie, he said, "Wow. These women made some bad choices."
I had never thought about that before.
I must admit that over the past few years, I've met a lot of good guys. But for whatever reason I didn't like them. Instead, I CHOSE losers. Yep, I've made some really bad choices. I guess I'm like the lady in green.
What do you guys think?
Do you believe the woman has the power in a relationship?
What about when the woman is the pursuer? Doesn't the man make the choice about whether or not he wants to be with her?
Have you made any bad choices?
2 comments:
I think we are all in control of our destinies even when think we aren't.
I also think people say they want to be married or in a committed relationship and then do things that are counterproductive, such as choosing to spend time with a man who has said upfront he doesn't want to be married. Or, if you are certain you want to have children, why spend time with someone who doesn't want kids or isn't sure they want them? I see this happen a lot and I don't understand it. If you want to be married with children then invest your energies and time in men who want to be married with children.
A guy gave my friend this advice years ago: women need to like the men who like them.
Yes, I agree women are IN CONTROL! We decide if we want to continue or enter a relationship with a man. However, we have too many standards for the man. Now I'm not staying lower our standards, (they are there for a reason) but we can compromise. And I am saying this to myself.
Many guys hope we will give them a chance, LOL. So I agree, the opportunity is there!
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