Monday, March 1, 2010

Wrong Number

I had to hang up on him. I really did.

I met "Ray" about a decade ago through a friend who thought we would make a good couple. It didn't work out romantically (and you'll see why by the end of this post), but we remained cool. We would call each other maybe twice a year just to check in, say hi, what you up to, how you been.

When I met Ray he was a physical education teacher. But over the next ten years he would have a host of jobs — security guard for a strip club; security for a federal government building. He got a bartending license, but I don't think he ever worked at a bar, lounge or anywhere else that served alcoholic beverages. He became certified in personal training, but never got any clients or worked at a gym. Somehow he got in the mortgage business and started doing reverse mortgages for senior citizens. Like the other jobs though, that didn't last long. At one point he told me he wanted to be an actor. About five years ago he came up with a plan to open a gym for young people and offer tutoring services. I thought it was a good idea. He never came up with the funding.

Are you beginning to understand a little bit about Ray? Do you get my drift?

Anyway, I received a call from Ray today. He told me that he was in a bind. What do you mean? I asked. "I'm in a bind. I need some cash," he explained. Why? I asked. "Because with the snow storm it was hard for me to go out and get my money."

Huh? What?

So Ray, who is 41-years-old, explains that all these people owe him money, but because of the Blizzard of 2010, he hasn't been able to get out and go get his money.

Wait a minute. It gets better.

He tells me that in January, he flew to Memphis one-way to buy a car he found on the internet. What kind of car? A BMW. He drove the car from Memphis to Atlanta to South Carolina, stopping along the way to visit family and friends. Three weeks later, he was back in D.C.

Wow. I said you have that much leave from work where you were able to take off 3 weeks at the beginning of the year? He admitted that he didn't have a job.

okaayyy...

February comes and the snow hits the east coast. All of a sudden, he's looking for these so-called friends who owe him money. Nothing. He's in a bind. He can't pay his rent, his utilities. March 1, he calls me. Man, are you serious?

Do you see anything wrong with this picture?

I did. I asked Ray why he would go to Memphis to buy a car and he didn't even have a job. He tried to convince me that the car wasn't that expensive. (Did I mention that he was 41?) That's not the point I said. How much is your rent? I asked. $800. You went and bought a BMW, drove cross-country and now you can't pay your rent? I was disgusted at the whole situation.

Then I asked if he was looking for a job. He assured me he was. Okay, why don't you go back into teaching? I asked. He said he would never go back into teaching. Honey, you don't have a job. And in this economy, the options are few and far between. Plus - you can't pay your rent!

Sigh...Ray, on the outside, is a good catch: college-educated. Never married. No kids. But he's not, how should I put this, not...well, he just doesn't have it all together.

I had to get off the phone. I really did. I just couldn't stomach his nonsense any longer.

Was I wrong?

8 comments:

SingLikeSassy said...
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SingLikeSassy said...

No you weren't wrong. This reminds me of the time this dude I dated for a minute called me up out of the blue and asked if he could come stay with me. And bring his newborn son, too. Um, what? He was leaving his wife and didn't want her to know where he was going. With their son. Their NEWBORN son. You know what I said right? No. I am not getting caught up in your marital/custody mess. And don't call me again.

This dude looked good on paper too. Ivy undergrad, masters degree and top 10 law degree. But the reason we only dated for a minute is that he couldn't seem to get it together. And I wasn't interested in a screw up.

TNDRHRT said...

Heck no you were not wrong for hanging up on him! Wow! Just wow! His priority is not finding a job??? And he's being picky at that? You should have told him to miss you with that.

BPC said...

That post cracked me up!!! A good laugh, thanks, Lot. You were absolutely NOT wrong. In fact, you were nice to listen as long as you did. Incredible that he is 40 years old and doesn't have a clue how to be a man...

Anonymous said...

You talked longer than I would have!

Anonymous said...
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Anonymous said...

I met this guy a few years back who has the same kind of ambivalent, all-over-the-place life. His big dream is being a rap artist, but that hasn't quite worked out. So he changes jobs every other week it seems. We don't know each other all that well--definitely not nearly as well as you know Ray. But he thought nothing of calling me year before last to ask me to "lend" him $3000 to pay back child support! I wouldn't have had the nerve to ask someone I barely know for that kind of cash, but I guess nothing ventured, nothing gained. I haven't talked to this man since that conversation.

Anonymous said...

People are nuts! Why would he think you'd give him a dime? Clearly he doesn't see how stupid his behavior is. That's frightening.